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Douchebag quote of the day!

December 17, 2009 1 comment

This is taken from an article about the new possibility of the male birth control pill.

“It is time for men to have some control. I think it would empower men and deter some women out there from their nefarious plans,” says Brown. “Some women are out there to use men to get pregnant. This could deter women from doing this. An athlete or a singer is someone who could be a target and they could put a stop to that.”

Wow. Thanks for that Quentin Brown.


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Categories: contraception, men, ridiculous, sex

Being male in the writing realm equates to more success

December 16, 2009 Leave a comment

James Chartrand, of Copyblogger and Mens with Pens, is coming out. As the true woman that she is. James Chartrand, which is a pen name, explains the struggle she was having before she got into the online writing biz. She tells of how she is a single mother, who was on the brink of having to go on welfare and not being able to feed her two daughters. She decided to look online for writing jobs, as she knew she could write well and do it from home. She did this for a good while, under her real name, but it just wasn’t cutting it. She explains that before she took up a male’s pen name, that she would be struggling to get jobs, as well as not receiving the pay she knew some other people were getting. She then decided that she was going to make a pen name for herself, something that would “command respect”. She chose James Chartrand.

Once she did this, she got more jobs. She got more pay. She got compliments. She didn’t have to do many revisions. She states,

Understand, I hadn’t advertised more effectively or used social media — I hadn’t figured that part out yet. I was applying in the same places. I was using the same methods. Even the work was the same.

The exact same work. It was equal by all means, yet, because she now had James as a pen name, everything was better and easier. She explains the positives here:

Taking a man’s name opened up a new world. It helped me earn double and triple the income of my true name, with the same work and service.

No hassles. Higher acceptance. And gratifying respect for my talents and round-the-clock work ethic.

Business opportunities fell into my lap. People asked for my advice, and they thanked me for it, too.

Astounding. If that’s not a slap in the face for women writers, and women in general, I don’t know what is. Most professional women just want to work. They want respect for what they do, because they love what they do and they work hard at it. But still, just because we have vagina’s, we apparently aren’t as good as men. We aren’t as respected. We’re ignored. We’re sexually harassed. We’re discriminated against. Just because we have vagina’s. Really? Does a difference in genitals really make a difference? The clear answer is no, but still today, it is an issue. James talks about this, as she mentions that women writers have been doing this for ages, however, she states that,

Since then, we’ve had feminism. We have the right to vote, to own property, to be members of Parliament and Congress, to get a job, and to be the main breadwinner of the family. And yet apparently we haven’t gotten past those 19th century stigmas.

No, we haven’t gotten past the 19th century stigmas. That’s why feminism still exists today. We need it, and James Chartrand has once again proved that.

Click here to read her post called Why James Chartrand Wears Women’s Underpants, which tells her whole story.


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AIDS and Gender

December 1, 2009 Leave a comment

With the recent finding that HIV/AIDS is the biggest killer among women in their reproductive age, we know that there are some serious issues that need to be looked at in terms of this disease and gender.

We know that for most women (an estimated 98% of all women affected by HIV/AIDS live in developing countries), treatment, prevention and ultimately, equality, are things that they do not have access too. Let’s talk about gender inequality for a moment, shall we? Gender norms are a part of this inequality and accounts for much of the spreading of this disease. UNAIDS states,

Gender norms, for example, often dictate that women and girls should be ignorant and passive about sex, leaving them unable to negotiate safer sex or access appropriate services. Gender norms in many societies also reinforce a belief that men should seek multiple sexual partners, take risks and be self-reliant.

And let’s not forget, they also mention how in in many cultures, violence against women is condoned. So looking at the gender norms of men, it’s apparent that women automatically become more vulnerable to HIV/AIDS. These uber masculine gender norms continue to hurt women in many ways, but especially in this area. And of course, when women and girls are supposed to be “passive” towards men about sex, it doesn’t prevent the spreading of HIV/AIDS. A way to hurdle this is to of course promote gender equality, empower women to know more about their bodies and sex, and teach men that these norms aren’t good for women, or themselves. And of course we can’t forget, if there is going to be consensual sex, use a condom!

The WHO talks about another issue that comes up with gender norms. They call it “gender-related barriers” for services, or treatment.

Women may face barriers due to their lack of access to and control over resources, child-care responsibilities, restricted mobility and limited decision-making power.

Socialization of men may mean that they will not seek HIV services due to a fear of stigma and discrimination, losing their jobs and of being perceived as “weak” or “unmanly”.

How true. For women of course, it appears that they are not in control of the decision to go seek out services or treatments. How horrible, but true. Women once against face the brunt of this disease, because of their lack of options. Men on the other hand probably do have much more access to services or treatment, but because of their societal gender norms, they refuse to get treatment. This hurts men. This hurts men a lot. Any cultural idea of what hegemonic masculinity should look like, usually hurts men and it can be seen here that men also pay the price.

I’m not going to sit back here and think I know the solution to all of this. I don’t think anyone actually does; and even if they do, solutions are a very hard thing to put in place and people will still continue to live with HIV/AIDS and die from it. However, I do say that promoting gender equality is a must (it’s a must anyway, but I digress). Through promoting gender equality, women and girls will have more rights, as well as have an understanding about their bodies and understand that consensual sex is where it’s at. Now, I’m not saying that women and girls always have the choice of consensual sex. A lot of times they don’t. But for them to know that that is what kind of sex should be happening, is a must.

Women and girls do unfortunately bare the greater responsibility and consequences of sex many, many times. After all, we are the ones that get pregnant and we are the ones that are more vulnerable to STIs. It shouldn’t be our complete responsibility, however, it sometimes ends up like that. Women and girls must be educated about safe sex and the possibility of HIV/AIDS. Many women and girls are in the dark about this because they have not had access to this kind of education. Of course, this still will not prevent HIV/AIDS, because some men will insist that no condom be used.

And this brings me right back around to promoting gender equality. When women are able to make decisions and choices about their bodies and sex, we will see a decrease in HIV/AIDS, in both women and men.

If you want to read more about AIDS and gender, visit AVERT.

Men Against Violence Against Women, Part 2

November 18, 2009 Leave a comment

So, going on from my previous post about the “Men Against Violence Against Women” panel discussion, I just wanted to mention some other things that stuck out for me.

1. What is a woman’s role?
So, although it is clear that men must take responsibility for this issue, there is still an important role that women play, and have been playing for many, many years. Resistance. Women have been resisting violence against them for a long time and women must continue to play this part. Our resistance is extremely important. But now, since we’ve been resisting for years, it is time for men to respond to this resistance!

2. Safe spaces for men
New safe spaces need to be created for men to discuss these things. These safe spaces need to be places that men can come and grow and learn how to have an emotional life, outside of just having anger. This will bring together a collective of men who believe the same things and will be able to fight against violence against women.

3. Live the way you believe
Finally, what I want to end with is something that one panelist said. “Live the way you believe”. This is the first step in action. This means that everyone can act. It doesn’t matter who you are. If you believe certain things, live it out. Do not be silent. Your silence will condone this violence (or whatever other issue it may be). You CAN help this situation, no matter how helpless you may feel. It doesn’t have to be some huge act. Small acts everyday will build into a great movement, and actually be a part of a movement that is already happening. I hope that you feel a little inspired to at least try something!

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Men Against Violence Against Women Panel

November 17, 2009 2 comments

Last night, I had the great experience of attending an all men’s panel discussion, provided by my university’s Anti-Violence Network. The panel was entitled “Men Against Violence Against Women”. I wasn’t sure what to expect when I first showed up, but it turned out to be a great discussion and some awesome points were brought up, that I want to highlight here.

1. Men need to acknowledge hegemonic masculinity
One speaker went over the basic hegemonic masculinity in our North American culture. This means strong, invulnerable, emotionless, silent, and angry (with anger really being the only emotion allowed). Homophobia is also a part of this. Men aren’t allowed to be feminine in any way, because the traditional man is supposed to be everything opposite of femininity. All of these things open up the pathway to violence, because women and homosexuals are “othered” or dehumanized; therefore, men feel that they CAN be violent.

2. There needs to be a new conception of masculinity
There needs to be a positive conception of being a man, which will make for better partnerships with everyone (women, other men, and children). Men need to reconceptualize strength. Strength can be something that is good, and not used for harm. Also, there needs to be insight within this new masculinity. Openness, self-reflection and self-awareness are necessary for this new masculinity.

3. Men must take responsibility
Many times, men are excused from their violence, or have some form of excuse for their violence. One of these excuses is that it’s a man or boys “nature” to be violent. But we were reminded again tonight that nothing is biological about violence! But another important point was that men who are not violent against women must also take responsibility. These non-violent men must not be silent. They must tell other men and boys that violence against women is not acceptable. Without these men leading other men and boys, this issue is NOT going to go away.

4. Action must be taken
One panelist discussed how there is too much damn research. We all KNOW that there is a problem, and we can continue paying for research to be done, but it’s not doing anything about the problem! We need to move on from identifying the problem. It is now time to seriously act. We must be examples to the younger generation. We must tell others that this issue is not acceptable. However you can act against this issue, you have to do it!

There were some other really awesome things discussed, which I’m going to save for a later post, since I don’t want this post to go on forever. I will just say that it was simply refreshing to hear men discuss this issue and not pat themselves on the back for having this panel in the first place. You know, that self-congratulatory thing? Not cool! So, it was awesome not seeing that. More discussions like this need to happen, because ultimately, this is an issue that only men can get rid of.

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Sexism and racism found in customer service study

July 20, 2009 Leave a comment

A recent study found that customers in North America are found to be more satisfied when they receive service from white males, as opposed to women and minorities. How am I not surprised…?

The research by University of British Columbia professor Karl Aquino found that female and minority employees who exhibited the same behaviours as their white male counterparts were rated lower in anonymous customer feedback surveys.

The group that was conducting the study were actually very surprised.

“We had thought there would be some bias going on in the sense of people who were males or whites would be rated more positively,” Aquino said

“But we didn’t anticipate that for performing the same behaviours, the women and minorities would actually be rated lower,” he said of the study to be published in the Academy of Management Journal.

On statistic shows that a “white male clerk’s service, for the same pre-scripted actions, was rated 19 per cent higher than the service from a female or black male.”

Nineteen percent?! That’s a little ridiculous. Honestly though, I’m not overly shocked. I believe that we have this notion ingrained in us that the “white male” is the most trusted person on the planet, that there is none other more qualified, therefore they obviously provide the best service. Also, this of course has to do with the power that the white male has as well. It definitely affects how we respond to people, even if it is completely subconscious. But how do we get away from this thinking? I don’t know if I have a good answer to that. There are so many things that need to be changed in our society before we can change our thinking completely. We definitely need to vocalize how this sexism and racism is wrong, and that the white male is not the be all and end all of the human population, and we need to start teaching this to the younger folk who are being fed this patriarchal, white-power society.

This kind of thing just discourages me. It just reminds me (not that I need too many reminders!) that sexism and racism are unfortunately ingrained in our minds and that this kind of thinking is going to be so hard to beat.

Categories: inequality, men, racism, sexism, society, work

Lucy Liu feels bad for men

January 7, 2008 1 comment

Hm. Lucy Liu has pulled a “women are so confusing, making men more confused” kinda thing. This is what she said:

I think men are in some ways a little bit confused but I don’t mean that in a bad way. There was a time when they were expected to open the door for a woman and pay for dinner and do all of those things. Now they don’t really know what to do.

Well, firstly, it’s courteous for anyone to open doors for anyone else. Gender doesn’t matter. But car doors…ugh. I’m personally not that patient, and since I’m a capable human being, I can get myself out of a car. But really, can’t men, and everyone else understand that we simply want to be treated as an equal? No, you don’t have to banish all “romantic” gestures or whatever you want, but just don’t look down on us and treat us in an inferior way.

Not too difficult.

Categories: equality, men, women Tags: , , ,

It’s about time!

December 28, 2007 1 comment

A male pill that acts as a contraceptive is finally being developed by scientists. It’s definitely about time, and I’m sure many, many women will welcome it. It would essentially be the same take-it-once-a-day pill, but it would give women a break from worrying about their pills side effects.

The tablet will be welcomed by women worried about the hormone-laden female version’s links to breast cancer and fatal blood clots. It could also allow couples to share the responsibility for contraception – a role that traditionally falls to women, who could in future have to decide whether to trust their partners.

I like the fact that men could actually take more responsibility in this area. Why do women always have to take responsibility? It takes two! So, that’s definitely a nice aspect of the pill.

And the great thing is, with the research that has been done, the male pill doesn’t affect the man’s libido or his fertility. So for couples who want to have a baby, it wouldn’t be hard to get off the pill and start trying right away.

Good stuff.

Categories: contraception, men Tags: , ,

Of course! Being kind is all it takes men!

December 28, 2007 Leave a comment

New craptastic book alert! Victoria Zdrok, a Penthouse columnist, is the author of a new book called Dr. Z on Scoring: How to Pick Up, Seduce and Hook Up with Hot Women.

The Economic Times (for some weird reason) has a little article about it. In it, it explains that being kind is really the only important things and that pretty much any women, whether she’s attracted to you or not, will give into your great man-kindness and at least get in bed with you!

“And kindness is one of the qualities women most look for in a male. Be sure to have a good sob story handy about the times you were ‘down on your luck’ and now want to ‘pay back’ the community. Next thing you know, you’ll be enjoying soup in her kitchen,” Zdrock added.

Um. Ok. Is this really how all women work? I doubt it is. And if men were smart at all, maybe they wouldn’t listen to someone who works for Penthouse. I mean, seriously! Oh, and of course, the book mentions “women’s lib.” So good.

“Contrary to your instinctual aversion to women’s lib, National Organization for Women meetings are the perfect breeding ground for available horny women,” she wrote.

“Liberated women are much more likely to cast away outdated notions of courtship and chivalry . . . and you just might get laid on the first date,” she added.

Warning to all liberated females at the National Organization for Women meetings/conventions/whatever. Be weary of any man that comes and is kind, tells a sob story and clearing looking for some ass. Since you know, we’re liberated and all, so we’ll just sleep with absolutely anyone we can get our hands on.

Categories: books, men, ridiculous, women Tags: , , ,

The church is “feminized”?

November 16, 2007 Leave a comment

Oh lucky me that I came across this! First, quote of the day:

Men today need to experience Christ in all of His masculinity and power, and they need to do so in a context that speaks their language in the company of other men.

Seriously? Anyone who has any knowledge of the gospels knows that Jesus Christ represents a much more feminine take on things. People could very well disagree with me. But personally, I’ve always looked at the Old Testament God being a more “masculine” manifest, while Christ in the New Testament is the more “feminine” manifest of God. But that could just be me. I simply get this interpretation from my own reading of the Bible.

Anyway, the article goes on to talk about how the church is “feminized” and pretty much how it’s the most horrible thing ever. Men need to take back the church! Ignore women’s needs! You know? Please, men have had the church ever since it’s conception and they continue to have it. Until all denominations and the Catholic church decides to ordain women, men have all the control. And even when women are allowed to be ordained, there will always be more men on the pulpit than women. I have no doubt about that.

Here’s a description of a “modern” church today (and this is something that’s negative, I guess):

Look at a typical Canadian church today: most volunteer roles are filled by women. The sanctuary is normally decorated in soft colours, with draped baptisteries and large floral arrangements. More than half of those seated in the sanctuary are female. A disproportionate number of married women attend church without their husbands. When it comes to worship, many of the newer choruses sound more like crossover love songs and often speak of being in someone’s eternal embrace. Most men find it difficult, if not impossible, to relate to these songs since it’s not how they normally think or speak.

I would just like to say that there are more women volunteers because those volunteer positions are undervalued and women in the church feel like they can’t do anything else. They only feel like they can teach Sunday School, do the nursery and be a part (but not the leader) of the worship team. As well, I personally haven’t seen this church that is described. I’m a pastor’s kid, and I have been to many, many churches in my life, and they are not “decorated in soft colours, with draped baptisteries and large floral arrangement.”

All just my opinion…but, I call bullshit.

Categories: church, gender, masculinity, men Tags: , ,

Lots of news!

November 10, 2007 Leave a comment

Things about motherhood and the economy that feminists supposedly don’t want anyone knowing!

Women are even discriminated against at coffee shops.

Don’t say you want to be a nurse if you’re a man!

Japan is falling behind in gender equality.

Women can now be appointed as assisstant bishops in the Anglican Church.

This is what will most likely occur if Roe falls.

A man is sentenced 70 years to life for sexual assault.

Teen girls are being denied any contraceptives in Jamaica.

A call for more male feminists

November 7, 2007 1 comment

Or, anti-sexist male activists. It’s pretty much all the same. Jackson Katz, who is one of the leading male anti-sexist activists, spoke to the New England Patriots and the U.S. Marine Corps that men can’t sit around and do nothing about sexism and violence against women in our society. He calls for men to “stand up to a culture that allows the physical and psychological subjection of women.” Well, I would say that I have to agree!

“We need more men with the guts to break out [of] complicit silence,” Katz said.

Too often, Katz said, men allow themselves to disregard the issue because they are “good guys” who don’t beat their girlfriends or assault women.

In a culture rife with sexism and gender-based violence, refraining from hitting or raping a woman may not be enough to make a man a “good guy,” he said. “We need to raise the bar a little.”

I am really all for male feminists. It’s true that more men need to step up and realize that men are the problem and they should be active in influencing boys and young men that sexism, violence against women and any other “women’s issue” (of course, not just an societal issue, always gotta slap that women’s in there!) is not acceptable in society and women shouldn’t be the only ones to fight for this cause.

I sincerely hope that men take up this notion, because it’s really for the importance of one half of society.

I’m suing Shonda Rhimes

November 2, 2007 1 comment

I loathe Grey’s Anatomy for making this mainstream and getting men to think that we should switch the word from vagina to vajayjay.

In Michael Smerconish’s blog over at Huffington Post, he talks all about the harnish of the word vagina, and how it is uninviting. How no one has ever gotten used to the word vagina and people feel very uncomfortable using it, especially men.

It’s a reminder of the difficulty men of all ages have had in coming up with the proper name for what’s in the female zone.

Um, since when does a man have to come up with a “proper” name for my vagina? They don’t have one. They can keep on using the name it already is, and if they really have an issue with it, fine, use vajayjay amongst yourselves, but please don’t try to push another word on us. And I know some women and feminists who like the word, so ok, that’s fine. But it sounds like he’s getting at the fact that he has power over this area, which he does not.

Oh right, and then he attacks feminists. He says that feminists have much interest in our vagina and that we don’t want men “attracted” to it. So, he’s pretty much saying that feminists are asexual beings. Right. That’s bullshit. And everyone knows it!

The reason why people have been and still are uncomfortable using the word is because a woman’s “private parts” have been looked at as a lot of worth almost the entire history of the world. People still want and expect women to be sexually pure, and in some places it’s a must. But men on the other hand can be as sexually promiscuous as they want. Their sexual organs are not as “special” as a woman’s, therefore it’s so much easier to say penis than vagina.

So, ultimately, I blame this one on the patriarchy completely.

Categories: feminism, feminist, men, sex, women Tags: , , , ,

Women are simply “demanding and pushy”

November 1, 2007 Leave a comment

As opposed to the man’s “assertive” in the workplace, women are still being looked at as “demanding and pushy”.

An experiment was done to see how employers would react differently to a man and woman that have the same resume, same interview answers, and are going for the same job.

The results: The volunteers were 30 percent less likely to hire the woman than the man. The reason: She’s too demanding and pushy, even though she said exactly the same things as her male counterpart.

Hmm…interesting. Clear gender bias and sexism. The article goes on to say that the employers bias comes from nature or nuture, or little bit of both. It is still true that perceptions towards women in the workplace aren’t good. She’s pushy, demanding, a bitch, and she must be a slut too if she’s worked her way up the corporate ladder!

So, why is this sexism still occurring? Women can be and are just as good workers, or better, than their male counterparts. Why do employers still get away with this gender bias? Oh how the world is cruel and unfair.

Categories: men, sexism, women, work Tags: , , ,

Does fullfillment come from men and children?

October 31, 2007 2 comments

There is an interesting article debate over at Huffington Post. It’s worth the read, by the way!

The first article, by the founder of thestateof.com said that fullfillment most definitely comes from men and children for women. Some highlights…

Feminism has destabilized society by undermining heterosexuality and the family. This perverse assault on gender difference is disguised as an act of “defense” of women’s’ and homosexuals’ “right” to be single and childless. Women have been duped into seeking “power” and “independence” (aloneness) through climbing the mirage of the corporate ladder. What women really want is power expressed as male love.

Without a child to care for, a woman often becomes frustrated, bitter and distracted. She often uses the “success” of her “career” (which is simply a glorified word for “job”) as a replacement for the void of the missing child.

Ok, some of my points now. First of all, do women and homosexuals not have a right to remain childless or single? No law is saying that anyone is obliged to have children or be in a couple, married or cohabiting. And guess what? “Independence” is not aloneness. It’s being able to not have to depend on another person, which a life skill that everyone should have. At times, we are able, or can choose to rely on people, because it would be hell if we couldn’t, but being independent does not mean “aloneness”. Oh, and that power expressed as male love? Give me a break. Sure, we’d all love some love, but that’s not the only thing that we can have for fullfillment!

Also…some women honestly do not want child and are completely happy with their pure careers. There is nothing wrong with this. Some women are not nurturers. For example, my father was and is the nuturer, or “mother role”, in the family, although currently he does make more money. While my mother is much more cold and distant, and takes much pride in her career choices. In the end, my father would be more devastated if he didn’t have a child than my mother. Why are people so keen to generalize women and men into one category?

The other article, by Rebecca Thorman, takes the other side of the argument.

Whether we check off men, children, career, or all of the above, the fact is that we have a choice, and what fulfills and limits us is not created by society and media, but increasingly our own desires.

The kind of woman who is a compassionate alpha. The Generation Y woman has leadership and strength, and promotes community and empathy. We don’t dismiss motherhood, but embrace our strengths and use those to change the workplace, reaping from it a greater sense of fulfillment than ever before. It is not a coincidence that at a time when power-hungry hierarchies are being broken down, women are leading and infiltrating the workplace. It is our skills and talents that have created such an influential shift.

I’ll just say that I obviously agree with the second article more. And just for the record, I do want some male lovin’, some kids, but I’m not going to give up my career for having that. Obvious sacrifice have to be made by both men and women when children come into the picture, and those sacrifices are individual choices and worked out in a personal setting. No overgeneralizing should still be occurring!